Monday, March 26, 2007

Scrambled Brains

I am F'd up. My younger cousin was 3 days past her due date. I was freaking out. Post-date pregnancies are horrifying to me, even though I've never been there. I know the statistics.

The baby arrived safely on Saturday. For which I am grateful. However, relief quickly turned to jealousy and envy. I am resentful that she gets to keep her first baby and I did not.

Nothing I can do to change that set of conflicting, opposite emotions. But I feel those two parts of my psyche warring against each other and it makes me feel like a lunatic.

5 comments:

Laura said...

I'll always and forever be jealous of anyone that gets to keep their first baby. I'm looney right along with you.

karla said...

I can totally relate to the jealousy. Even though Nate is finally here and in my arms, other people's uneventful pregnancies and deliveries are still making me jealous.

kate said...

I'm glad the baby is safe and i totally understand the jealousy. ((((hugs))))

Anam Cara said...

Same here delphi. Two months before my Joe was born my SIL went 16 DAYS past her due date (yikes!) and refused to be induced. I was freaked out. But then she went into labour on her own and pushed out a a healthy 9 1/2 lb baby girl in a labour that lasted all of 2 hours. I was jealous beyond belief. So I totally understand. (((hugs)))

pipsylou said...

I was sent pictures of my friend's new twins. I hate that when I looked at them, I thought, "They look like little piglets! She's going to have SUCH a hard time for awhile!"

I hate that. BUt it's how I feel.